Yanal will be in Italy for the next 4 days. He will be home for 1 day and then traveling to Cypress for another 4 days. I will be at home, in Jordan, alone, with the kids, for the first time. Yanal and I have never been apart for this long in our 10+ years of marriage. He has never been away, overnight, since we've had our kids. My Mom had a good idea to blog about pre-Yanal leaving, the interim and post-Yanal's trips. So here it goes:
How is Yanal feeling about being gone for so long?
Well, he's not feeling too good about it all. It's for work, so there's no choice in the matter. When he took this job, we knew that it was going to happen, international business trips on occasion. We still don't know how often they will happen, but here is the first and the second trip back to back. He is really upset to say the least about leaving our kids. Especially Aisha, he has a special place in his heart for our little girl. He loves her like no other father loves his little girl (well, except how my Dad loves me and my sisters)! And Omar, well, Yanal is already feeling like he is missing out on so much while he is working all day, everyday. Yanal was pretty much a Stay-at-Home Dad and a full time grad-student before he got this job. So he is use to watching the kids grow and develop. He knew more about Aisha as a baby than I did: I think that's why she is so close to him. Today, Yanal looked over at Omar standing up on the coffee table, reaching for something out of reach and it almost brought him to tears. We both wondered where this little man came from!
As far as how Yanal feels about leaving me for so long, well, I think he is starting to feel more comfortable about it. We got all the groceries bought, car full of gas, phone numbers I may need and reminders of how to get to the stores I may need to get to. He also let the guard know the situation and I can depend on him if anything is needing to be fixed in the apartment or any security issues. Yanal trusts me and knows that things will be okay, it's just hard the first time around and for such a long time.
How am I feeling about Yanal being gone?
If you would have asked me a few days ago, I would have told you that I am anxious about it. I was questioning to myself: Do I know how to drive to the grocery store? Do I know how to drive to my in-laws? Do I know how to drive safely around Amman? Do I know what number to dial in an emergency? Can I think of any safety issues? What do the kids need, formula, food, diapers, wipes, etc? Do I have everything I need? What if the kids drive me crazy?! The list keeps on going. At first I felt that it would be best to have Yanal's sister stay with me the whole time, then I thought maybe I should just have one of the maids stay with me and help, then we decided that one of the maids will come over for a day to help clean and if I am totally in need of a break from the kids, she can stay the night with me.
At this time, I am feeling pretty good about him being gone for so long. I'm not saying that I am happy about it or not slightly nervous about it, because I am still somewhat nervous and I don't love the idea of him being gone. But, I trust myself. I am a grown woman who has taken care of herself for years. I take care of the kids everyday, nothing new there other than the days will be longer. Even though the driving is a bit crazy here, I know how to drive and I know how to get to places on my own. I don't know the language very well, well I'll just call Zeina if I really need a translator otherwise I'll just wing it! I am feeling that this will be a good experience for me. It will force me to be more independent and not rely so much on Yanal doing everything for me. Poor guy, since we have been here he has been taking care of everything! This will empower me to drive to the store and around the block by myself....it's such a weird concept that this idea makes me nervous. I guess I just don't want to get lost, I have 2 little ones depending on me! It will also force me to interact with people outside his family on my own, hopefully it will strengthen my Arabic!
I will miss my husband greatly, his help around the house and his friendship. However, this experience will force me to be more independent which I have always been before.
I hope the time apart is going alright for all of you. Just think, it will be that much sweeter when you are all together again after spending time apart. Coming from someone whose husband has been gone for work the past 7 of 9 weeks, I believe that absence makes the heart grow fonder! :-) I can picture the smile on Aisha's face as she is running for her Pappa so he can pick her up and give her a big squeeze! Love you! - Sarah
ReplyDeleteThanks Sarah...so true, so true! I can't wait to see my kiddies faces too when they see their Dad again! Tomorrow evening he will be home!
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